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Whole Body Orgasms for Kinky Play

8/24/2015

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Howdy hi my hotties,

Now I know you think my blog is orgasmic
– thank you – but today it really is, as I unfold the scintillating unreality of whole body (multiple) orgasms as revealed in my book and in Game 20: The Mindblower.
So kinksters, if you like:

  • restraints, ie bondage
  • cuddling in catsuits
  • tying up and teasing
  • sensual play
  • queening
  • mummification
  • cages
  • plastic wrapping
  • vac-beds

and a myriad of fetishes and kinky play practices where one of you and your consensual partner are 'restricted', then you may want to add these tricks to your personal repertoire, if you haven't already. (That horny feeling you're amplifying? – Just add this...) Moreover, learning whole body orgasm practice can prolong play and add a sustained dimension of intimacy and glowing anticipation to your pervy proceedings.

Of course, these physical, minimal movement 'exercises' will show you an incredible side of yourself you won't believe... until it happens. And once learnt, you can do them virtually anywhere. Why? Because it's hands free and the eh-hum, outcome, is... dry.
So, are you sitting (un)comfortably? Then let me tell you a story.

Once upon a time I went to a music festival.

During a hot summer’s day my attention was kept in alert mode by an inordinate number of scantily-clad rock chicks.
As one does. In the evening I found myself sharing a tent with a male friend and frustrated by the fact that propriety prevented me from relieving myself from the pent-up excitement of seeing so many wonderful female forms. Strangely though I felt I could enhance the good feelings I had around my nether regions by focusing on the images in my head and ‘throbbing’ myself by will internally – thus not disturbing my sleeping friend.


As an experiment I kept going, as I felt there seemed to be an escalation of joy taking place, now not just in my groin, but throughout my body. Obviously my friend beside me was oblivious to my ‘inactivity’ as it would have appeared. And as it the festival campsite was so noisy, it proved a welcome distraction. By dawn I had moved into a blissful euphoria that became pronounced, sustaining itself for more than half an hour. Unbeknown to me I’d had my first whole body orgasm.

A few months later in WH Smiths I was gob-smacked to see The Multi-Orgasmic Man on their shelves, not least for the title but also because I found my hands-free experience exactly described inside. Wanting to spread the gospel to my mates about the raptures of being a multi-orgasmic man I gave the book to a few friends. The response was a series of confused looks ranging from hurt (“what are you trying to say?”) to ignorance (“I always thought you were gay”) from pride (“yeah, thanks, ehm, I already know”) to cliché (“God, you’re not into all this hippy psychobabble are you?”).

With the floodgates of knowledge now opened by the advent of the internet, surely attitudes had changed enough to reappraise this mind-blowing information?
Let’s look at the benefits, clarified by the book. Firstly, the ‘multi-orgasmic’ bit refers to dry orgasms, not an ejaculation. Next, they’re internal, you pulse and glow on the inside. Thirdly, it’s not exclusive to men, women can have them too. Finally, orgasms reverberate over the entire body, not just the one spot. More significantly though, this information has been with us for thousands of years.

Most whole body orgasms in fact, occur through Taoist (pronounced ‘Dow-ist’) practice. Those into Tai-chi, Yoga or martial arts know the word ‘practice’ indicates no final result, but that the journey is all. The individual is ‘work-in-progress’, reflecting the changes within you and in life generally.

But is it worth it?  
Imagine the best sex smile you’ve ever had – the one with a partner you connected with or didn’t want to run away from post coitus. Take that warmth, love and happiness from you laughing together and somehow, place that positive feeling into your arms and hands, legs and feet, head and brain, torso – and then of course your sexual
organs and erogenous zones. Then feel it sustain from anything from fifteen minutes to an hour. Yes, yes, it’s worth it.

A new realisation of the power of the living world hits you, humbling and elevating you both at once. Its only psychobabble if you don’t…practice.


How does it work?
All the action takes place in an intimate area for both sexes, the space between the genitalia and the anus. A nickname for this place is ‘nifkin’ or ‘gooch’. Have fun with those words today. The proper word is the aforementioned ‘perineum’.


Above this is the pubococcygeus (pew-bo-cox-ij-ee-yus) or ‘PC’ muscle, between the pelvis and tailbone at the base of your spine. Here, it controls urine flow and contracts during orgasm. By ‘pulsing’ or tensing and relaxing this muscle (try it now, no one can see) you will get a hint of the latent power within you. An aid to practicing this ‘pulsing’ is through pressure on the perineum or ‘The Million-Gold Piece Point’ – this was the price it cost to get a Taoist master of ancient times to show you where it was – these days it’s called ‘Million Dollar Point’.  Apply three fingers here, where the urethra passes near to the skin – the place exerting the control of the flow of your pee. Pressing this point can you get you to a point where you no longer need manual assistance.

Some may recognize this as the appropriated ‘Kegel exercise’ formulated by famous gynecologist, Dr. Arnold Kegel, in Los Angeles during the 1940s. He found that clenching and unclenching the PC muscle strengthens and tones, so reducing pelvic floor problems in women. They are also good for treating vaginal and uterine prolapse, while helping with urinary incontinence in both genders. Time for a picture of a man's bits and pieces.

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PictureMantak Chia, see book links below
The Chinese have been doing this exercise for years.
Good for health, longevity and spiritual development, Taoists have claimed that the ‘Deer Practice’  – observers claimed
wild deer were doing this as part of their mating ritual – maintains youth by preventing anal prolapse. The PC muscle is pulled and held for as long as possible, or flexed and released for a specified count, together with breathing or posture techniques for variation.

In Chinese medicine, ejaculation is seen as a loss of life-energy or chi (qi).
If you
want to stay young guys, chasing whole-body orgasms will help avert premature aging, disease and fatigue: in short, no more ‘little deaths’. As Taoist master Yang Sheng yao Chi said:  “A man should learn to control his ejaculation.

"To be greedy for feminine beauty and emit beyond one's vigour injures every vein, nerve, and organ in the body, and gives rise to every illness.”  In effect girls, when he does learn to control his oozing, he won’t turn over and start…snoozing.

What is interesting for men is the idea of limitlessness. The rest or refractory period – in physiology when the organ stops working in order to reenergize – can eventually be non-existence as multiple orgasms can be sustained. Practitioners point out that focus over a long period is needed, that is, until you feel the waves of gratification pull you to more intense sensations. Generally, men (yang) have to hold on to reach their personal nirvana while women (yin) tend to have to let go.

This is all such good news, should it not be on the news every night (maybe squeezing
out the sixth repeat of Two and Half Men?) so that we are all getting it? How happy we are when we sate the senses and our sexual cravings? How much more relaxed and harmonious we would feel with others. Or slightly suspicious of the smiley perve sitting rather too quietly at the bar.

The Book of Kinky Sex Games: Kink, Fetish and BDSM Through Adult Play advocates adding whole body orgasmic practice to any or all of your kinky sessions. See Game 20: The Mindblower


The Multi-Orgasmic Man: Sexual Secrets every Man Should Know; Mantak Chia, Douglas Abrams; HarperSanFransisco (amazon.com – prices vary)

The Multi Orgasmic Woman: Mantak Chia and Rachel Carlton Abrams; Rodale Books (amazon.com – prices vary)
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Kink & Spontaneous Sex

8/10/2015

1 Comment

 
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Hi Gang and... Gangbangers

I'm back after a break decorating my flat (dark red mostly seeing as you didn't ask) and thought I'd better answer this email sent to me from 'Maria' in the Czech Republic, a Fifty Shades Trilogy reader and newbie newbie:

"I've read through your blog and your articles and I have loads of questions ; )

First of all I was surprised that there seems to be quite an extensive philosophy behind the whole kink scene, which I didn't really expect to be honest. You're talking a lot about how important communication is. It all sounds quite "complicated", meaning that you have to spend much time with your partner to find out what he or she wants and how your sex life will be performed. I wonder if you have spontaneous sex as well?

"At the moment it sounds like, before actually having sex, you need to spend hours on talking about it?! I know it's more than the actual sex but still, does it happen spontaneously as well?

"Another thing that came to my mind is if you're having "kink sex" only... So are you getting turned on only if kink is involved or does it depend on the situation/people etc.? How or when did you realize that you liked those things? I can imagine that it must have been quite an overwhelming discovery..."


Firstly Maria, thank you for reading my blog and sending in these insightful questions, and in English! I don't represent all kink of course, but I do speak about the positive version of it for consensual adult play and I can give you both private insights and generally-held opinions.

Maybe I can rework your questions a little for clarity.
Many kink people love complexity, as this is a sign of intelligence and cerebral engagement. They tend to rally against the clichéd 'vanilla' relationship model where everything can seem tired, limited or unthought through. Kink people – fetishists, BDSM practitioners and pervy sex lovers – go on a lifetime journey and develop their buried desires as they mature. It's like a rebirth of sorts. It could be they have always known too.

But as this journey, or effort, becomes important to them, they tend to carry their differences proudly.

Do I have spontaneous sex?
Personally I never had at the beginning of a relationship, because a guy tends to get knocked back a lot before he meets someone, then he avoids the obstacles and makes a lot of effort to go dating or engineer meeting that compatible someone, and then women will always have the final say, of course.  Often I have failed to get excited as the man expected to be a machine and thought of as 'always after one thing'. And one night-stands can be pitiful.

As women get older and the body clocks switch around the reverse is more true where women give chase and do more of the work towards a 'spontaneous' moment. A dominatrix came round once and forced straight sex on me. It was very strange, and as a guy I couldn't say, erm, can we have a moment (and kill her moment)?  I was too bemused, polite and busy trying to get hard for her. It was kind of an assumption that she – the woman – was that wonderful.

But then this automatic sex assumption probably stems from the fact that some men will fuck anything and/or quickly. But this usually means the the woman will get a rough deal long term, as part of the charm of a bad or sex-led boy is that they don't give a fuck. And literally won't give sex any more.

In any relationship then – vanilla or kink – pretty much a couple tends to go for it according to each others habits (rhythms) and moods. Spontaneous sex will occur a lot in the honeymoon of love, but tends, generally, to peter out over the years. Kink couples are just as abnormal as everyone else – ie. there is no such thing as normal. (Under the microscope we are all different or weird really). So they will or won't be up for spontaneous sex depending on who they are and at what stage of their body clock and relationship they are at.

Kink couples who are experienced with each other tend to have sex/kink whenever without prior chats, because they can read each other – usually better than vanilla couples, because they have invested all the conversational time in already. What kink in itself will do is form a closer bond where consistently good times are more likely than just straight sex. And straight sex is also on the menu too, of course. Some do pervery at weekends, some as a lifestyle, others hide it from their partners.

The thing is, kinky couples have answered the problem of consistent sexual congress over time, whether it's spontaneous, planned or planned to be spontaneous. And yes, this is perhaps why vanilla couples may turn to 'bondage and whips' when they approach middle-age.

Some kink practitioners pride themselves on only getting turned on by their kink, and this makes up a major part of their sexuality. Personally, I feel that a holistic approach is better, where everything is open to discussion. Including... how much discussion.

I have a long list of things I've tried... you've seen the book right? It was never overwhelming, just a while to learn to be the best of myself, and that still takes practice, and I'm glad to do it. I have my fetishes: I enjoy the feel, smell, look and the wearing of leather, PVC and especially latex, also silk, satin, sheer for sex scenes or going out. I'm a switch so I like to be dominated and to dominate. The play BDSM side for me I think starts with the visuals and actualisation of dress up, then to the practices.

Fundamentally, I get off making a woman happy, whether she wants to make love, have lots of foreplay, wants to submit to me (where she has set out the parameters) or wants to make me her 'sex slave'. Kink provides me with an arena to access this important of me that wants to give without fear of being disrespected, undervalued or taken for granted.

Two examples of kink sex spontaneity for you:
1. A man is caning a woman over every spelling mistake she has made (Game 36). She cries out for more caning –for she is a needy, greedy submissive – and instead suddenly, off the cuff, the dom lubricates her anus and defiles her. This can happen because in a pre-session discussion the couple know that instantaneous anal sex has been agreed upon. Where it gets pervier... well, I'll leave that to your imagination.

2. A woman wakes up in the night and turns on her bedside lamp (Game 49). Beside her is a man cocooned in a rubber sleep sack buckled up tightly. He has plenty of air and is dozing. She unzips his 'suit' to play with his nipples and penis, just because she feels like using him 'spontaneously'. She gets herself off watching the man get erect and her toying with him as he writhes around in frustration. She comes and turns of the light and sets the alarm again for an hour and a half later. At dawn she might reward him.

A lot of it is... anticipation, extended foreplay, the first stage of female orgasm before the plateau. Kink is a way to SUSTAIN sexual interest, as for days after you would be thinking about a very private, very personal, deep route to the mind, soul and body thing you did together. Naturally, this is the same for LGBT kinksters as well, and the preferences inherent may or may not come into play.

In conclusion Maria, in my opinion, get the SSC (safety, sanity, consensuality) and the communication, psychology and aftercare right between you and your partner and kinky sex can't help but be caring, loving and bonding, spontaneous, prolonged or consistent.
It loops it's goodwill into itself.  You know it's working because you're both excited and usually beaming from ear to ear.

It might be that after a day of reminiscing over the night before a couple get home and just fuck on the kitchen table. It could be that just talking about it gets you off, as the channels to the mind and body open to other sensations and new kinds of orgasm.

I hope this helps you find you and your consenting partner with things to dream about!

Play safe and have fun,
Jackson ; ) x
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    Jackson's Blog

    Jackson Rocco is a
    lifestyle writer, event speaker & author of
    The Book of Kinky Sex Games
    utilizing 20 years experience practicing

    safe, sane, consensual fetish, kink & BDSM.
    As well as being a
    nightlife journalist
    for Skin Two, LateXtra
     magazine and Denmark's 3xL webzine, he has also contributed to the
    womens' sex magazine Scarlet and The Guardian's
    G2. For FAQs see page 4 of The Book of Kinky Sex Games or the Culture
    Kiddo interview
     in World Domination.

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