Week 3

Sexuality. I finished last time by talking about the lovely female prison officer who most definitely liked my thigh high leather boots, enough to 'pat me down' at any given opportunity. 

I can't say I minded it that much. 
This isn't the first time a woman has displayed an interest in me, far from it! I get hit on by women pretty often, particularly in straight bars. Yet if I go to a gay bar, women ignore me like the plague. 

Go figure. 

So I often get asked if I'm straight or Bi. And the honest answer is, I can't answer that. On the surface, straight is the obvious one – romantically speaking, I've only been with men. 

The problem is that I don't think of people in gender... any more than I think of people in race or colour. 

"If I look at you
and a massive
bolt of lust runs
through me,
my pupils dilate"  

If I like you, I like you. 
If I find you attractive, I find you attractive. 
If I look at you and a massive bolt of lust runs through me, my pupils dilate and my imagination runs riot, my breath quickens, my... 

Well, you get the point ;-) 

Thus far, I'm straight.
That's not to say I haven't found women attractive, or even had the occasional seriously erotic dream involving a woman.
Or two.

Well, does that make me straight? 
Bisexual? Bi-curious? There are so many descriptions and titles out there and it becomes a veritable minefield when you get Googling. 

Does anyone ever really have such a definite idea about their sexuality? 
Or are most people kind of fluid about the whole thing? 

WHAT DO YOU THINK? (Comments below)

Till next time,
Nicky x

So this week was an interesting one – a trip to stay with family in a leafy City Suburb, with a do-gooder's visit to the local prison.  

Maybe I should explain a bit more...
My family are uber-religious church clergy – that's vicar to most people – who live a squeaky clean lifestyle and frown disapprovingly if I say something that sounds like I Want to Swear, but don't. 

Just the swearing tone of voice, the general attitude, is a no-no. Luckily they don't know I'm a kink-obsessed chick with a penchant for fishnet. Seriously, they don't know. 

My relatives, however, do know that I go out to the pub with mates on occasion (Ha!) and generally like to be sociable. They already think I've gone completely off the rails because I smoke, have the occasional beer, and believe in sex before marriage. Oops. 

It's like being home as a kid again. I'm always having to watch my language and behaviour, and dress like a freakin' nun. Which means that when I get back home I chain smoke, neck bottles of beer, and generally have a blast. 

Which brings me to the visit to the local jailhouse.
Which rocks, in a weird kind of way. But I have to be on my best behaviour – I don't think said Vicar really approved of the thigh high leather boots I was rocking. But the female officer who insisted on patting me down 'for security' practically every time I moved; she did like the boots. And, I get the feeling, a bit more... to boot. 

It was amusing, if a little fucking weird. 
Oh, did I just swear? Must be time for a beer...

Till next time,
Nicky x

Week 1:
I've Started, So I'll Finish

"I'm done with online dating.
With 'kink' in my profile I got half the planet's weirdos messaging me!

What they failed to read, among the other stuff, is that I am looking for a monogamous long term relationship. Mo-no-ga-mous. Say it with me! 

And among the oh so charming 'fancy a fuck?' messages and dick pics, however, were some real gems. Here are my favourites, with the writing left as it was sent:

1) 'Do you like Japanese?' 
I asked what my first online suitor might be referring to?
Could it be food? Anime? Torture? Culture? Or indeed...if it was a euphemism.
He didn't know what euphemism meant.... Next!

2) 'How can you have sex you have too kids.'
What a charming way to start a conversation.
I didn't reply to this smooth talker.
For would I start with the lack of basic spelling and punctuation?
Or would it have to be a simple biology lesson?
And some women manage to have even more than two kids, genius. 
I left him to figure these difficult questions on his own.

3) 'I am disabled and so need my hair done. Where I can do this?' 
¿Qué?
Hey, wrong website, sweetcheeks. 
And how does being disabled necessitate a new hairdo?

4) 'I me you marriage sexy kin do ok now please horn yes?'
Yup. Exactly.

When I took the kink out of the equation I 'met' some lovely people:

• The 30 year-old city boy who needed help with a new CV and interview skills. 
  
  
• The trust fund kid who started every message with: "I have a penthouse in (insert expensive city centre)!" Who didn't know why he was attracting gold diggers. 
  
  
• The suicidal middle aged man who told me all the weird details of his life and his psychiatrist. 
  

Yes, all these men seemed all lovely enough, but not remotely near what I have been looking for.

And then there's the opinion of my extended family...
...But then this is not their story, it's mine!

A story I'm calling How I Get My Other, subtitled; 
How I Get my Kinks, My Guy and Hopefully Both. 
And I've started now so I'll stop.

Till next week."

Nicky x

Being part of a movement is so satisfying. By that I don’t mean the gurgling I feel lurking in my tummy the morning after one of my man Rubberdude’s infamous currrrrraaaaayyyy nights!

No, I was privy to a most different kind of movement on 11th October 2014 when Rubber Revolution reared its anarchic head to offer a new latex-only event to the gummi glitterati of the world. A rubbery hand-chosen selection of choice perves were invited along to Murder Mile Studios in East London to sample the choice sweetmeats this rebellious revelry had to offer. 

At this very classy locale the focus of the evening was dedicated to rubber adornment, fun and fetish play, where the essential and significant elements of this new event are that you must be in full rubber. And, amazingly, with a bountifully-equipped dungeon, BDSM and fetish play to the nth degree of consummation is actively encouraged with no worry of a disapproving bouncer tapping you on the shoulder.

So, to kick off the evening a smorgasbord of nibbles and prosecco served by a Hannibal-hooded maitre d was made for a cordial, welcoming touch downstairs in the Murder Mile bar, where as advertised it was a relaxed Bring Your Own Drinks policy. Situated next to this, in an annexed studio, Rubber Bandit – one of the most talented photographic artists on the scene – spent the night capturing image upon image of pervy portraiture. 

During the course of the evening a plethora of cheeky choons were spun, playing homage to alternative greats such as Kraftwerk and Joy Division. To begin with the music was at conversation level, but as the party started pumping the volume went all the way to eleven with some pretty dirty moves going down on the dancefloor: a perfect compromise I felt.

Upstairs depravity reigned with a dreamscape of dungeon equipment. Here the rope suspension points were put to good use by Artifex_DK, in from Copenhagen, and his glamorous rope bunny Miss Olympia, both demonstrating Japanese Shibari par excellence with some of the most elegant and exquisite tying and suspension I have seen in a long time.

For me personally, I have to say the most deliciously naughty highlights were to be had in the medical room overseen by Miss Velour and partner Vulcanised. Their NnP apparatus had the air of a nutty contraption direct from the set of Carry on Screaming complete with knobs, levers and big shiny silver gas canisters. I was honestly hoping OddBod didn't make an appearance.

In an attention-seeking bout of in-house navel-gazing we asked our mostly vanilla app developer at Silicon Lifeforms to give us his perspective on what it was like dealing page after page of kink whilst turning The Book of Filthy Sex Games from a literary work into an Android app.

How long have you been making Android apps?
Four years. I wrote an app called Calcutrip. It's a journey cost calculator.

How did you get involved with The Book of Filthy Sex Games? 
I've been friends with, well, tolerated, the author for several years. He told me about the book and asked me if I'd like to do an app version. I called him a pervert and told him to piss off. Then I decided I might get to see women in latex, so I said yes.

What made you decide to say yes to the project? 
I'm all for people experimenting, but with stuff like this it needs to be done carefully and safely. That is the books raison d'etre and a good reason to do it.

Have you told you friends and family about this app? 
Some of them. Those who I feel are open-minded enough to be able to deal with it.

Are you yourself experienced in the kink content in the app? 
Experienced? Only in my mind.

What was it like working with such content? Did you enjoy it? 
It was an eye opener! There were a number of terms I had never heard before and, frankly, never want to hear again. Though I do seem to be developing an obsession with ladies in tight, shiny outfits.

Is there much difference between it and other digital formats? 
As the text is part of a larger computer program it meant we could offer different functionality to other formats, like storing favourite games and searching by venue, duration etc.

Did the author help you with the app or did he leave it to you? 
He dealt with the formatting, asked me a lot of silly questions and was generally annoying.

How were Google Play about the mature content?
They were fine. They have systems in place to allow developers to warn consumers of more adult content. It's very simple and effective.

Are there plans for an Apple app version? 
We're seeing how sales go. If it's well received we'll look to do an Apple version.

Who would you recommend this app to?
Anyone curious about adult games and how to get into it safely. 

What has been the responses to the app so far? 
It's early days for the app, but the book has had some incredible reviews.

Has The Book of Filthy Sex Games been controversial do you think? 
It could be. There's always the possibility of controversy where sex is involved.